Clearing Up Misperceptions

I had the chance to watch the Oprah show yesterday in which she celebrated the 25^th anniversary of the Color Purple. What struck me was the conversation between Oprah Winfrey and Whoopi Goldberg at the beginning of the episode. They spoke about how they cleared up a perceived misunderstanding they had when each thought the other one was upset with them.

I was impressed at the honesty of the moment and thought how many of us go through life and we do not clear up misunderstandings. We waste years on holding grievances, when a clear and direct question "Are you upset with me" or "Did I do something to offend you" would clear the way for honest dialogue.

One must be really brave to ask that question. Because what if the person answers yes, you offended me. How do you handle that? You have to stay strong, and just listen to them. To the best of your ability, make a sincere effort to clear up the misunderstanding. It takes even greater courage to say I am sorry.

Today, I encourage you to take that brave step and have an honest conversation.

In some families, please is described as the magic word. In our house, however, it was sorry. ~Margaret Laurence

Pursuing the Dream

I have been off the blogosphere and I miss all of you. I am glad to be back and want to share with you what I have been up to. I finally finished the book that I had been writing about my mother called In Memory Of a Saint: Lessons from My Mother that I Didn't Pay Attention to Until She Died. As you know, I have written many posts about her and as a result, I wanted to capture her spirit in a book.

The journey has been marvelous as I have been able to put into practice what I preach which is to strive for your goal and to go for your dreams no matter what. I also had the opportunity to take part this summer in Jack Canfield's Breakthrough to Success Training and was able to be among others dreamers.

Today, I hope all of you are pursuing your dreams with passion!

In Memory of a Saint-Honoring Mom

In memory of a saint, I honor my mother today. Usually it is customary to use a white flower to honor a deceased mom on Mother’s Day. I choose to pay tribute to my mother today with a red flower because her spirit is alive and well.

Everything that I am is because of the strength of my mother. People have asked me through the years where did I ever get my unwavering belief of self and faith in God. The answer is simple, my mother.

I keep her memory close to my heart and with great admiration for her joie de vivre. She was a great lady who took risks in life, and had a faith that was unshakeable. For someone who was small she was soooo mighty.

I am honored to be her daughter. I hope to one day leave a legacy that is half as great as hers. So with the greatest of love and respect, today I remember my mother, a saint in my eyes and my heart.

The Power of Forgiveness

During this season of Lent, I have been working on the lesson of forgiveness. I have to say that this hasn’t been the easiest thing in the world. With ongoing health issues, I made the conscious decision to release the negative toxins in my mind that can exacerbate pain.

I have come to the realization that yes, although I have been emotionally hurt by people, they have no power over me if I don’t let them. The choice is really mine. Now I am not saying that it is easy to release that pain and let it go. However, my perspective is that if I leave this earth, I can say that I worked on it.

The true power of forgiveness was demonstrated recently when a man forgave the drunk driver who plowed into him and he subsequently lost a limb. For the entire story: Weymouth man forgives drunk driver who cost him his leg. This man was an example of divine mercy. He has shown a grace of spirit and compassion that most of hope to achieve in our lifetime.

I am working on the seventy times seven principle and I urge you to do the same. Ironically, one of the Greek definitions for forgiveness is "let go.” Are you holding a grudge against someone, or has someone hurt you and you find it hard to forgive them. Today I encourage you to LET IT GO! I know I have long way to go but hey that is what living is all about. Have a joyous day!

“Peter came to Jesus and asked, ‘Lord, how many times shall I forgive my brother when he sins against me? Up to seven times?’

Jesus answered, ‘I tell you, not seven times, but seventy times seven.’” Matthew 18:21–22

Saying Goodbye

This weekend, I had to take my cat Boo Bear in to be put to sleep. He was a wonderful animal and had lived a long full life. He was 16 ½ years old when he died.

I am left with wonderful memories and the comfort that he lived well. His journey with me was now at an end. I realized that grieving is for the living and not for the one who is gone. I knew I had to make the decision to either let him linger in pain or assist him peacefully on his journey home.

As I sit here, reminiscing of the times we shared, I am able to reflect on the wonderful gift of unconditional love and friendship that he gave me. I give thanks for the memories and wish him eternal peace.

“I believe cats to be spirits come to earth. A cat, I am sure, could walk on a cloud without coming through.” ~ Jules Verne

A Weathering Perspective

I am so enjoying the change in New England’s weather. We are finally drying out after a deluge of rain hit the area. So many of us are still dealing with the aftermath that to see the sun has put a smile on everyone’s face.

I have Rheumatoid Arthritis and the damp weather often takes a toll on me and believe it or not can make me irritable. I decided I needed to get out of the “ain’t it awful club” and be grateful for every bit of rain and every ray of sunshine that God has bestowed upon us. At least I have hands that hurt and I have legs that although they may ache, they still function.

This shift of perspective and the feelings of gratitude reminded me of BJ Gallagher’s poem about the weather and I thought it was apropos. We often say, “We weathered the storm, or weather it out.” Enjoy the weather wherever you are and be grateful.

WEATHER REPORT

BJ Gallagher

"Any day I'm vertical is a good day"...that's what I always say.
If you ask me, "How are you?"
I'll answer, "GREAT!" because in saying so, I make it so.

When Life gives me dark clouds and rain, I appreciate the moisture that brings a soft curl to my hair.

When Life gives me sunshine, I gratefully turn my face up to feel its warmth on my cheeks.

When Life brings fog, I hug my sweater around me and give thanks for the cool shroud of mystery that makes the familiar seem different and intriguing.

When Life brings snow, I dash outside to catch the first flakes on my tongue, relishing the icy miracle that is a snowflake.

Life's events and experiences are like the weather they come and go, no matter what my preference.

So, what the heck?! I might as well decide to enjoy them.

For indeed, there IS a time for every purpose under Heaven.
And each season brings its own unique blessings.

Bossiness is not being a Bitch

I have been told that I am bossy. I have been told that I can be a bitch. I have been told that I am too opinionated. It is interesting to me that people define a woman's strength as bossy, or bitchiness whenever they assert themselves. Yet those same traits in a man are deemed as courageous, bold, a leader. Why is that?

I have decided that I am going to wear that label as one of honor and not a defect of my DNA. No, I am not a female dog. Yes!! Dammit I am a leader. I stand before you proud to be forthright, direct, bold, and sometimes even bossy.

I do not need to step on people to get ahead. That is not the trait of a leader but of a dictator. However, I will use my intellect and my mouth to forge my own path.

I have been told that I am a dreamer. I have been told that I am passionate. I have been told that I march to the beat of my own drum. What labels are holding you back or giving you the strength and determination to blaze your own star trail?

Be Bold! Be Proud!

Dare to Be the Person You
Want to Be!